For my whole life I have wanted to me a mother. I can remember being as young as 7 years old and wanting to play with and take care of the kids in Kindergarten at school. I used to play "house" until I was old enough to babysit and even then I was still playing "house" in a way.
I remember the first babysitting job I had I was 11 and I would take the baby who lived across the street out to the park for an hour once a week so her mom could have a break. As I walked away with the stroller, I was one proud gal. I truly enjoyed spending time with kids and babies and I was fascinated by mothers of young kids. If there was a baby in the room, I was right there. I put myself through university with babysitting jobs and up until just recently, even after I became a teacher, I continued to babysit because I liked it.
I have wonderful memories of all the things I did with the kids and babies I looked after. I used to have this terrible fear that I wouldn't be able to have my own baby. As each friend or relative my age started to have babies in the last few years, a brief pang of jealously would come over me because I was so anxious to have my turn. In the days before Nora was born, when she was overdue, I even had myself convinced that I wasn't going to have a baby after all and that the whole pregnancy was just a cruel joke that someone was playing on me.
Even after 14 weeks, I still cannot believe this is my life. I cannot believe that I finally have the baby I have longed for. I have a daughter. It feels like the best dream I have ever had- that I accomplished that goal of mine, to become a mother. It feels like all the things I have done in my life up until now were just opening acts to the main show and I am so excited to see how the rest of it unfolds. I am so happy.
Winter is here and this week has seen a lot of lazy days at home with my two faves. Mr. Tweedle is still home before starting a new job and we have spent every waking moment playing with and looking at Nora. It's a lot more fun when I can share it with someone! I'm so glad he's home.
|Uncle Pud and Auntie Janine were home this weekend!|
We conquered "sleep training" this week and I am so happy to have that over and done with. Nora took it like a champ and within 3 nights of listening to her cry (me sitting in the other room wringing my hands) she now falls asleep on her own- it's magic! We put her in the crib and out she goes! Sometimes for naps there is 5-10 minutes of fussing, but then she sleeps. No more rocking, bouncing, shushing or the infamous "transfer" from my arms into the bed in hopes she doesn't wake up. Bedtime and nap times used to be a little stressful- I was never sure how long she would take to fall asleep and I never let her cry at all. Now, they are peaceful and enjoyable for all 3 of us! We are struggling a little bit with short naps, but when a girl sleeps for 12 hours straight every night, I don't blame her for wanting to be awake and in the action during the day!
Nora finally got her toes! She has been working on that little task for about a week now and just yesterday she did it! It is now her favourite activity- sucking her hands and grabbing her toes. She also spun a full 360 degrees on her back while we were playing last night. She kept grabbing her feet, rolling onto her side and then she would be slightly moved to the right. She kept going until she had gone a full circle. It was pretty fun to watch.
She has gotten better at grabbing onto toys too and continues to smile and just generally be the sweetest, most adorable little baby we've ever seen!